Goin' Disney? Go To The Expert

(This post is especially for my dear friend Julie D. - and anyone else planning a Disney vacation anytime soon!)

After our awesome Disney adventure last September, I promised myself I'd tell y'all about Small World Vacations and the expert travel planner, Denise Preskitt, who made our vacation absolutely wonderful.

Then, of course, I completely forgot to do so. Sigh.

So, when I read on Denise's blog that she recently got to spend the night in Cinderella's Castle, I thought that was a great excuse for me to make up for past omissions! Here goes - if you're planning a Disney vacation, trust me, people - call Denise at Small World Vacations. They're the experts, and she's the expert extraordinaire at the big stuff (she'll make those Cinderella Breakfast reservations for you!) and the stuff they don't tell you about in the guide books - i.e. the new Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique opened in Cinderella's Castle the week before we went (had no idea), and Denise got Princess Elizabeth in for a "magical princess makeover" (Princess E's favorite part of the whole trip). She'll also alert you to special Disney discounts - ended up making our vacation about $2,000 less than I originally priced it to be. Seriously.

Even if you're not planning a Disney trip anytime soon, just check out Denise's blog for fun Disney stories and photos - it's fun to experience Disney through her expert eyes!

Pathetic, But True

I'm deep in the throes of an all-out pity party.

My dear hubby has a week-long corporate meeting to attend in January, and he's going here.

More specifically, he's staying here - which is the reason for my aforementioned party.

I've been wanting to stay in this hotel, I dunno, forever. It's so expensive, though, I thought it was now specifically reserved only for Oprah, Bill Gates and select members of the Wal-Mart family (the ones they let out in public), so I was content to gaze longingly at it while on the monorail.

(Side note: Yes, I know I'm blessed to have had the chance to go to Disney World at all, and that the hotel we stayed in on our last trip there was wonderful. But, this is a pity party - the indulgence of my selfish, pathetic, immature side that rears its sad, sad head more than I wish it would. I also occasionally hide in my closet and eat these - and you thought I had it all together, didn't cha?)

Anyway, he's trying to tell me he's going to be "working" and "in meetings" the entire time. Yeah. Uh-huh.

If I find one Minnie Mouse autograph or Disney Princess photo on him when he returns, he's toast. In the meantime, I'll be in my closet with Hostess goodies and my fat pants.

Disney Vacation Lessons Learned, Part 3

What most people take photos of at Disney World:

What a husband who works for a rival theme park company takes photos of at Disney World:

Trash on the ground (he was so excited to find this - not an easy thing to do at Disney.)

A particularly "cool" ticket-buying kiosk.

And the ultimate for my HR hubby - the Human Resources complex.

And people wonder why I call myself a "Six Flags Widow." Sigh.

Disney Vacation Lessons Learned Part 2

As soon as the lights go down on a 15,000-person amphitheater at the start of a nighttime show, and finding your way in the dark through the throngs of people frantically trying to make it to their seats before the show starts becomes virtually impossible, your four-year-old princess will need to go to the restroom. Immediately.

And, your two-year-old princess will begin to scream bloody murder when you get up from your seat and begin tripping over everyone else in your row to get aforementioned older princess to the restroom because mommy is "leaving" her with daddy - oh, the horror. Between the tripping and the screaming, you will not endear yourself to the people sitting around you.

Oh, and the four-year-old princess will then collide head on with another princess coming around the corner of the restroom, necessitating a trip to first aid and an ice pack on her forehead.

The little princess, having exhausted herself with screaming for mommy, will sleep through the entire show. The injured princess will enjoy the show so much she'll forget about the goose egg on her head until the end of the show, when she'll be really upset that her ice pack is now mostly a water pack.

And one of the people forced to sit behind you through the entire debacle will snap and strangle himself with his mouse ears and a turkey leg bone.



Ah...vacation is synonymous with relaxation, isn't it?

Disney Vacation Lessons Learned, Part 1

A soaking wet Jessica Alba. Very sexy.

A soaking wet me at Disney's Animal Kingdom evilly grinning at Grant, thinking about how I'm going to make him pay for the boneheaded decision: "We're not taking the rain ponchos with us. It's too much to carry, and it's not going to rain." Not so sexy.

Disney-fied and Live at BlogOrlando

Hello loyal readers (who am I kidding? Hey, Mom!),

Fresh off a fantastic Disney World vacation with dear hubby (Happy Anniversary, sweetie!) and the Princesses, today I'm at BlogOrlando trying my hand at live blogging - EEK! If you're interested in learning more about blogging, PR/blogger relations, etc., head on over to Standing Partnership's blog Where Do You Stand to read the latest - Marijean and I are furiously typing!

And don't worry - vacation stories are coming. :-)

You'll Miss Me, I Know You Will

If you're reading this blog often enough to notice when I don't post for several days:

1. Wow, thank you so much for reading!


2. You may notice that I won't be posting again for a week or so. The Thompson clan is headed to Disney World, where the Princesses will be surrounded by their royal sisters and will finally get the chance to dine in a castle. Tiaras may be a permanent part of the wardrobe after this trip.

Just when you really start to miss me, you'll be able to check out a slightly more professional (I said slightly - it won't be a snoozefest, I promise!) side of me when my colleague Marijean and I live blog from BlogOrlando on Sept. 28. We'll be posting on Where Do You Stand, the official new blog from our awesome employer Standing Partnership. I'll be back here with all kinds of vacation stories in a couple of weeks.

In the meantime, stay safe, hug your mamas and God bless you all!

Conspiracy? What Disney Conspiracy?

Uh...hi again Disney.

Just heard about your new Walt Disney World Moms' Panel - talk about an amazing opportunity for a select few of those who love Disney World to share their enthusiasm with your guests! Of course, I had to apply - I promise you won't find anyone who can describe Cinderella's Castle in better detail. And having eaten my way around Epcot on more than one occasion, I can outline the walking paths that will maximize caloric usage, allowing guests to stuff themselves and still fit into their clothes at the end of their stay - now there's a valuable service for your guests!

I hope you'll seriously consider me for the job...after you recognize my last post on Hannah Montana/the world domination of the Disney brand as the tongue-in-cheek bit of humor I absolutely meant it to be. I can also promise you that on only a few occasions in my life have I actually been nekkid, and no video or photographic evidence of those events exist - I'm old enough to safely say that no one actually had that equipment when I was in college. (Thank you, God.)

Love ya, Disney - the Mouse rules! :-)

A Disney Conspiracy? You Decide

I love Hannah Montana - really I do. It's a sweet show - nice kids, great dad, good wholesome values, yada yada. Miley Cyrus is a talented singer - not great in the acting department, but she's cute - and her dad, Billy Ray Cyrus, is a surprisingly good actor. And who can't love a show with Dolly Parton as the grandma? What a career trajectory that lady's had - from the madam in Best Little Whorehouse in Texas to a Disney grandma - if she can pull that off, Vanessa Hudgens has nothing to worry about.

(Side note to Hollywood starlets, 'cause I know y'all read this blog. Apparently your mamas didn't teach you this, so here goes: Keep your drawers on. This is not a hard concept. You step out of the shower, you put your panties on - and then you leave them on until you go to bed. At that point, if you want to shuck 'em and sleep nekkid, hey, it's a free country. Just check to make sure the yahoo you're sleeping next to doesn't have a camera or cell phone in the room. And don't give me that "he loves me and would never show anyone those photos" spiel - if you don't want the entire population of China, your high school's football team and a couple of serial killers-in-training to see your nether regions, don't let anyone take pictures of them! Geesh.)

(Side side note: If you're not Southern, you're probably going to need the definition of "nekkid." My all-time favorite Southern humorist, Lewis Grizzard, defined it perfectly: "If you ain't got no clothes on, you're naked. If you ain't got no clothes on and you're doing something you shouldn't be doing, you're nekkid.")

But I digress. Here's the problem with Hannah Montana, Disney execs - YOU ONLY MADE FIVE FLIPPIN' EPISODES!!! And you keep rerunning them - over and over and over and over. Is this a test to see how much moms can take before we snap, rip off our clothes and run nekkid (see, now you know what it means - you feel smarter, don't you?) down our sidewalks screaming, "Bring back Billy Ray's mullet"? Are you trying to make us freak out and shoot our TVs so our children will beg us to buy the new Disney Princess TV/DVD player - in pink. (Seriously, what's left - pink Princess toilet paper?)

Disney, I love you. I'm a big supporter - we have as much Disney Princess stuff in our home as we can afford. Princess G is going to be Minnie Mouse for Halloween. We're about to drop several thousand bucks on a Disney World trip next week, and I'm sure we'll have the time of our lives. Please leave us long-suffering moms with a shred of perceived dignity.

Don't make me get nekkid.